Not My Son

July 2004

Time has aquired strange properties.It has in real time been only two weeks but it seems like months.Occasionally I wonder if me too is experiencing the surreality that my son experiences. In a sense it is like being truely alive so intense is each moment.
Two days ago my son slipped on the soccer field trying his best to run as fast as he used to before. He is advised now to rest his foot for at least two weeks.Panic set in when he had high fever the next night. Panic for he is on clozapine and it remained unclear if the fever was due to a drop in blood count or resultant of the injury,as it turned out,it was because of inflammation.
The morning was full with calling up doctors, checking on the antibiotics,arranging for a blood test and hoping and praying that the fever was not due to sudden TLC changes.
The positives of this medicine are many if one bear the tension, each week, of the blood report.I was hoping that at the end of four months there would be respite however I hear that the drop can happen any time and a once a month check is sacrosanct.