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Yesterday, was another rougher evening. David lost his math assignment, he said he put it in his book and his book in his bag, but it was not there. he was upset, it was not his fault, but, No, no one else had touched his stuff! I told him he need to be certain to get the assignment again today before he came home. he got very upset, and in a not so great moment, I asked him sarcastically, "So what, a tiny demon jumped into your bag and took it?"
This lead to several hours of ranting that I was being sarcastic and sterotypical and prejudiced against his schizophrenia. That I had said demons jumped out of his head and into his bag to steal the paper...... This lead to you always jump my case everytime I try to do homework.... and refusing to start hishistory because I would jump his case...
Finally, David did manage to settle down to do most of his history assignment in order to be able to stay after school today, but I forgot that he had therapy today.
Well all things considered, today went pretty well. Since I had forgotton to remind David that he had therapy at 3pm this afternoon. This means i had to pick up early from school, when he was planning to stay after with friends. He had earned this priveledge after completing 45 of 60 problems on his history assignment after having a very paranoid rough afternoon, last night.
In addition, he forgot lunch money for the 2nd day in a row, and I did not know his lunch time had changed to an earlier time on monday! I met him at school with McDonalds, which helped.
The therapy appt went well, I was in with him for the first 1/2 hour. We tried to ddress how to cope and walk away to cool down when having an incident. ie.. going to his room, or somewhere instead of continuing threats..... Didn't get far :0(
After I left, Jen(tdoc) told me she tried to help lead him to some decision, and she got more of the "I can't, x will happen, they will follow me, its impossible....." shooting down every option she tried to suggest, yet unable to come up with anything on his own...
We did get agreement that he would take the clonopin when he gets home, but he complained that I confused him when I asked him to take it, as I was not clear where it was! It is almost always in his daily pill container in front of the microwave on the counter!
We see the pdoc on Thursday, I will ask about increasing the Risperdal, jen suggested maybe asking for Seroquel PRN for the sedation. He has taken it before, it was actually the first antipsychotic med we tried. It did not work well to contain things, but did tire him some.
I asked Jen about the paranoia, as this is the one thing that NEVER goes away. she got an earful of his belief that his dad was going to hurt him, wanted to harm him, he could not go to his room because Dad would follow him..... She told me that some people are very treatment resistant on this, and he may always be. She expressed some concern over did we feel safe. I told her for now, we are ok, but agreed that we were very close to insisting on hosp Sunday. That I flatly told David that he had a choice to make, either calm and stop the threats to us and himself, or hosp. I asked him if he would repeat his threats to an officer, then called the emer line to the CMH offices. At least, for that time, it was enough to calm him.
and life goes on........ He has a &^%=load of homework, but tells me since he could not stay after school to Hang today, he should be able to tomorrow, whether he does work or not! I'm not sure this is a battle I want to fight.
God Bless,
there is always a light, no matter how dim, if only we seek to find it.