The Joy of Madness

I hate feeling this way. Depressed that is. I fell into a depression on Tuesday. I stayed home all day. Today is Wednesday and I don't feel any better. I didn't go to the jazz concert as there were no takers. I feel like quiting the meeting.

I got a call yesterday about a resume I e-mailed a company that works with developmentally disabled people. They asked me to interview today but I couldn't go because I am too sick. I am having pain and fatigue too. So I feel like a loser because of that. I am not sure if I am staying in the area I live in or if I will be moving soon. I need to find a new mental health clinic but if I am moving I might as well not get started with another therapist.

I am having fears about my condition affecting my new relationship. He doesn't know that I am prone to depression and I don't think he would like it if I lived with him and didn't have a job.

I went to see my friend the other day at her board and care and we mostly stayed in her small room because she was sick to her stomach. I only stayed two hours because we couldn't go anywhere. It takes about an hour and a half to get there so I wasn't pleased to learn that she was sick when I got there.

I could really use someone to talk to but I don't trust the workers on the friendship line. That is a toll free number you can call to speak to a peer about non-crisis issues. I had a friend that used to work there and she didn't maintain confidentiality about her callers.

Posted by Butterfly Emerging at August 2, 2006 06:50 PM