A Daughter's Story

Schizo-Silent Sufferers and Family Members Be Encouraged

Here is daughterfirstborn again. I most sincerely owe all of you an apology for not returning on Friday as I promised. We had a couple of snowstorms, some were icy and treacherous, which caused delays and unforeseen situations.

My father called me on Thursday telling me about the visit with my aunt and uncle which I am indeed grateful that they did visit him. They brought him fruit and plenty of food to keep him supplied. However, he is still in the state of paranoia. I mentioned to all of you that I was going to see the psychiatrist for myself on Thursday and that I would mention again that my father needs help whether that meant for someone to have him involuntarily hospitalized or give him injections as needed. This would be to assist him with the stabilization that is necessary. Also, for him to maintain his ability to function to the best of his ability. Of course, his age has to be taken into consideration to do what is best for all involved.

Since I am seeing a lack of cooperation among siblings as far as dealing with him in a sincere way, I will continue to ask my aunts and uncles for the necessary help. We must realize that you cannot change persons whether they are your family members or not. If they have not taken an active interest by now, they will not. Sometimes all that a person needs is encouragement for someone in the family who they seldom hear from. This is why I strive very hard to take care of myself physically, mentally and emotionally because I cannot depend on family to do anything for me. I have been dealing with bi-polar disorder on my own since 1990 and I have never asked for a family member to help me with anything. I take my own medications, when I had been hospitalized, I would only tell my father, because the rest of the family were simply not interested. So, I know what it is like to battle with depression, mania, and even physical ailments on my own. Even when I had major surgeries, I was on my own. I am telling all of you that if you cannot handle the state that your loved one is in at the time, let it be. Let them know that you love them; however they have to get the necessary help that they need. In the majority of cases, they know what they need. Case in point: my father knows that he needs to take his medication; he has the symptoms of paranoia that are plaguing him....he is being bombarded with the voices, wrong thinking, delusions, hallucinations, etc..and I do indeed feel for him..when he gets tired of dealing with it and it may be for many months, he will get the necessary help that is needed. I am not being plagued like my father is; to the contrary I do have my share of trials and situations that I am currently undergoing that I have to make some immediate decisions in the next 48 hours in reference to school. I may have to finish the semester at home as opposed to taking the train two days a week because of a knee injury that has worsened and affected my ability to walk. My right hip when I get up from a chair and stand up and attempt to walk is affected. My stomach is getting somewhat better on the new medicines. Tomorrow, which is Monday, I will be going to the doctor's office in the morning for my B-12 shot, and I have another appointment. I will talk to my father(I can only talk with him by phone right now) also. By the way I did visit him on Saturday and I will not visit him in person again until he physically goes either to the hospital for help or to the therapist and the psychiatrist and get his meds again. He cannot restart Abilify and Aricept on his own. He has been off of his meds for at least nine months. There is nothing that I can do to restart him back on them. I am not a psychiatrist, despite my knowledge of medications. I have a PDR and I am always looking up various medications that I and my father take and I know what Aricept and Abilify are for.

All of us can really appreciate this website that schizophrenia.com provides. Do you notice that on the home page ABILIFY is highlighted in the beautiful blue letters? It is a medication that works if the client/patient/consumer would just give it a try and see how it works. This website is one of the most thorough ones that I have ever seen since surfing the web. I also want to thank the owners of this site for allowing me to share personal information with all of you about my experiences of being a daughter of a wonderful father despite the illness that schizophrenia is. It is a brain disease. It is not a father disease. Always remember to appreciate the wonderful gift of life. Cherish each and every day. Get yourselves a hobby or something special to really look forward to when you awaken each morning. That is what I would want for my father. I wish he had something that he could focus on. For right now, all that I would want more than anything is for him to get back on his meds and then he could enjoy life again without the voices, paranoia, hallucinations, etc. All of those things are real to him, not to me. The psychiatrist and therapist are aware of the status of my father and will be calling him again tomorrow. .
I will call my father before retiring for bed for a few minutes.

So, until next time, keep hope alive. Focus on all of your good qualities and efforts, not on your faults and failings. Hope is powerful therapy and can do a great deal of good. Where there's a will there's a way. Keep up the willpower-the desire and the determination by contemplating the value of your goals and the rewards that will copme to you by reaching them. Obstacles will arise, but view them as challenges. Next time-we will talk about fighting pessimism.

****Spring break is over and the university opens tomorrow. I will be back either Tuesday evening or Wednesday morning unless I get some extra energy from by B-12 shot tomorrow. I don't want to ever let any of you down. I feel it is important to write to you and share because your life is important to me and I don't even know you. Have a good night! 7:41pm NJ

Sincerely,,

daughterfirstborn45

Posted by at March 22, 2004 12:46 AM | TrackBack