A Mother in India

Striking a balance

After not talking much during the spiritual retreat and getting back to the daily routine, it took some time to getting used to talking and listening. It also dawned on me that I used to talk a lot of inane things, so I decided to talk as little as possible. This has made me feel calm in the same surroundings which earlier used to put me in a state of tumult and later weariness because of the effort to put on a calm front.
However it is difficult to strike a balance on how much to speak and how much not to. I found that if I spoke very little it did cause misunderstandings. For instance, two days ago I was meditating during the time my daughter was having her dinner. Not wanting to disturb me, she took out and ate two bowls of spicy and roasted cooked vegetables which were not meant for her. I told her that she should have taken the other bowls which were cooked the previous day and meant for her. She said that I had only told her to take the bowls which were in the refrigerator and since all the bowls were in she ate the ones not knowing which was meant for her.
So many mundane things one has to talk to maintain peace in the home. And the irony - when one doesn't talk much, there is so much of peace within oneself. I hope God gives me the strength to strike this balance.
On July 4, in the Sunday edition of the Indian Express, New Delhi, there appeared an article on schizophrenia wherein this site was mentioned. I had approached one of the editors on May 24, and urged them to bring awareness about this illness in India. I had also told them about how this site had brought three families together. The article was well written with a good illustration of a hallucination which my daughter experiences during times of stress. My daughter's story was also published alongside. My daughter did not want her identity to be revealed so it was published under a fictitious name. Unfortunately the title was 'Little Jekyll, scared Hyde'. Next time, one must make it clear to the media that such words only propagate the myths of this illness being associated with a split personality.

Thank you for your comments
Dear Moeder,
So good to hear that Cassie is doing well. How true when you say that we have no power to control most events which sometimes play havoc in our daughters' lives. We can only pray. Cassie is blessed to have a mother like you. My prayers are with you and your family, dear mother.