A Mother in India

Writing for the first time in 2006

I am writing here for the first time this year. I have been away from home for a while. When I return, it is still hot but something seems to be different. The Laburnum trees have blossomed. Some are so laden with the golden yellow Laburnum flowers; there are no leaves, only charcoal branches which act as a foil to the beauty of its flowers. As always I feel so happy when I see these trees. It is late when I reach home so I try not to make any sound as I open the door. But my daughter is awake and she comes down to greet me. As I unpack, we talk. I feel so proud that she managed so well when I have been away. She took care of the home, the old cat, cooked for her father, did so many chores and she looked happy.

This year has been full of challenges. My daughter’s relapse, her recovery, the resultant exhaustion, my illness and not being able to walk without support, physical pain which I look upon as an old friend visiting me again. The weariness of it all tends to overwhelm me one evening when I dress up to go to a get-together for the effort to get ready tires me. There I meet an old acquaintance who sees me with a walking stick. I have been never been very friendly with her but she comes running to greet me. Strangely her words have helped me so much. She took my hand in hers and said – ‘Surely you can’t give up. You have been through worse.’ The chaos recede as I think of each battle fought in our lives, the prayers to God for the strength, the resolve - not to let bitterness seep into our lives. It has not been easy but I am grateful to God that we have survived so far.