August 06, 2004

my past still haunts me...

my mom keeps nagging me to study. shes been doing this ever since i had been unable to study, and she hasnt got rid of her habit yet. she nagged me yesterday too, and i went into a dialogue with my mind, charting out possible ways to end my life, remembering all the times my parents got angry at me for failing my exams. i wanted to run away and kill myself. later my mom came up to me when i stopped talking to her and apologized, promising that she would never nag me again. she doesnt know the dialogue goin on in my brain. i finally accepted her apology and went off to sleep. guess i'm still bothered by my past that doesn't want to leave me. the sooner we get rid of our past and enter newer environment, the sooner we get better. We need a new environment so that the thoughts from the past don't haunt us. we need new people around us with whom we can interact. we need an understanding within ourselves about our own past. and the sooner we our able to remain stable with the thoughts from our past, the better it is.

so if ur past is still a pain, try realizing why it is so with a positive attitude, try encountering one thought at a time, dont immediately relate every other thought to it, for u will find it easier to become one with your past. breaking down our past into steps helps in conquering its fears just as the same way breaking down our studies helps us learn...

Posted by puzli at August 6, 2004 07:36 AM | TrackBack

Comments

Just discovered your blog today. A kindred soul - if I might say so. Hope you're doing well.......

Have you been on Olanzapine? Did it help? I'm using a moderate dose of OLEANZ and it has managed to keep the voices away.

Posted by: WillOerTheWisp at August 7, 2004 01:57 PM

Hi willoerthewisp,
No, I havent tried oleanz. i've been on risperidone since the beginning. thanks for ur kind words. it makes my day! take care. love. puzli

Posted by: puzli at August 7, 2004 08:02 PM

I need olanzapine.

Posted by: Bruce Kunz at August 14, 2005 12:44 AM

My brother is taking this tablet. Man!! I am very close to him than our parents but it is very very sad to see the kind of reaction it works in the body. Both him and his wife were highly depressed and I suggested both of them to take the Art of Living Course and they are practicing "Sudarshan Kriya" regularly. Trust me, it made amazing changes in them.

My brother was hearing all kinds of inner voices and get into all kind of bad habits to escape from his inner turmoil. Now his family is happy and healthy.
Sudarshan Kriya" regularly.

Posted by: eshwar at May 31, 2006 11:36 PM

im on oleanz and encoratechrno. i want to stop. i want to know the effecte that will be if i stop. i want to stop slowly. will i lose my mind if i stop without my doctor s prescription

Posted by: naomi at July 20, 2006 10:02 AM

please consult ur doctor regarding discontinuing these prescriptions. i knw once it starts wrkin one wants to quit it bt after a while the symptoms return. though it is possible to stop it the way u want to..the doctoe is the best person to tel u how to go about it. take care.

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