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She was cool about discussing her relationships. That is why I told her what I wanted to tell her. She had made the choice to talk about it. The other one had not. I discuss about my illness too with everyone. Well, at least everyone I feel who is ready to listen.
“Does that also mean that they are ready to accept it, and that is why you discuss it with them and them alone? The question here is – “how do you define when a person is ready?”
The answer is that – “when the person agrees to disagree”.
I told him about my smoking and drinking, and he went on to enquire in surprised shock about any red-light incidents and drugs. He seemed to be shocked, but trying to ‘cool’ about it. He may have totally despised it at a personal level, disagreed with it. But he was ready to listen to me and disagree with me (and still live in peace). He was trying to break out of the restrictions, trying to be free.
“But most people are not ready to do that, and how do we change them? When is time too short to tell them what they are not ready to hear?”
We present them with choices that they are ready to make. And they cannot look beyond the choices they have already made. At a certain time, some people may not be ready to listen, and some might be. You present them the choice, and the element of chance comes into play; fight or flight, they will have to make a choice.