July 26, 2004
Clonazepam
I went to my pdoc today. The previous doc of mine had put me on a regular dosage of clonazepam. This doc had been reducing it steadily. It is supposed to be habit forming. That's why the paranoia was there for the past few days. It were the withdrawal symptoms that were causing it. Now the clonazepam has been stopped completely and my risperidone increased to counter the withdrawal paranoia.
July 25, 2004
Paranoia
I've this feeling of paranoia...always had the feeling that my own people are against me. So I ran away from home....but now I know the truth. so i go outside my house and have a cigaratte. i ring up my friends, but i dont feel like talking to them, neither do i want them to speak, for it leads to information overload that my brain only increases the anxiety and paranoia...i only want to know that i'm connected to them...free to run when i want to...free to go to a place where there is someone i can trust...that's why i feel like staying connected to my friends on the phone...ultimately i finish my cigaratte and come back home.
July 05, 2004
New house & late hours
After a smooth but slightly stressful change of houses, i'm finally feeling that this is my place....was slightly delusional for a couple of days in between. It was mainly due to long hours I was putting in the night to complete my projects. That precipitated the nightmares too in the morning. I realized that it is necessary to sleep early in the night to avoid our overactive subconcious from taking over. A regularity in the routine with some relaxation and fun is necessary. Will be busy over the next couple of days with more projects. I'll be bach;) rock on!!!
